We're back just in time for Christmas and of course we get sick; because Bestie makes us go dancing after work, makes us walk six blocks in the freezing cold to the pub, and then proceeds to tell me that she is sick over cocktails, whilst blowing her nose in my general direction, AND that her co-worker has pneumonia! *cough, cough* Do you feel sorry for me yet?
BUT I have come up with the Pirate's Elixir to Everything!
When your car doors freeze shut and you can't get in for an hour because all your ice scraping tools are locked inside your car...have no fear, the Pirate Elixir is waiting for you! When you finally get into your car because some young, hunky, man helps you out and you are trying desperately not to cough in his face, but instead you cough so hard you start choking...have no fear the Pirate Elixir is waiting for you!
When you figure you better go buy some groceries before an impending snow storm (starving pirates with scurvy are not so attractive) leaving young, hunky man in your wake as you drive off, and then think you better go to the bank (pirates need to feel the weight of coin, even if it is just for the laundry), and do some Christmas shopping too (it is all about sharing the bounty, not to be confused with booty)...only to find your car doors are frozen shut again! Have. no. fear. the Pirate Elixir is waiting for you!
When you finally get home after scraping for half an hour to get into your car (because you were smart this time and kept scrapey thing in your purse), only to find your car trunk is frozen shut with your groceries inside and two bottles of Prosecco you purchased for Christmas...ummm have no fear, The Pirate Elixir to Everything is waiting for you! *cough,cough* You are definitely feeling sorry for me now aren't you?
The Pirate's Elixir to Everything
Get your favourite mug. You know that mug that makes you happy whenever you drink from it.
Grate two teaspoons of fresh organic ginger put it in that mug.
Add two tablespoons of Organic Apple Cider
Add one tablespoon of organic honey the non pasteurized stuff (come on, your body is worth all that sweetness. Don't argue with me I'm sick *cough cough*)
Add one ounce of Dark Spiced Rum (because Pirate)
Pour boiling water into that mug and stir saying, "I am a Pirate nothing can get me down."
Take that mug and press it to your heart chakra (don't burn yourself; do it whilst wearing clothes silly).
Drink that goodness down. *Of course you can omit the rum, but then it wouldn't be the Pirate's Elixir to Everything... only some things...like coughs, and colds, and sluggish yuckiness (which is an actual medical term I'll have you know).
If the Pirate Elixir to Everything doesn't cure you, order flowers. Flowers really are the cure to EVERYTHING. We have free delivery on all telephone orders for the month of December within the greater Victoria region only.
Code :Wildflower or Pirate Elixir
We'll honour both codes because we're Pirate Florists and we can do whatever we want! :)